Best way to approach a coach to tell them they are "wrong"

[Ebazounes]

This question is for coaches or people who have had similar situations. He always tells me to do thing on D that i know from being around some very experienced coaches in camps, from my select team and my brother who played college ball that i know are not correct. I try just ignoring but then he takes me to the side to try to show me what it is im doing "wrong".
Then one day i tell him my select coach says that is not correct, but he does not believe me/listen to me. My head coach is too good of friends to tell him that hes wrong.
But this caoch is donating money to buy home and away helmets for our team so i guess he is a decent guy away from lacrosse. My real question is for coaches how would you want a player (me) to approach you on this.

[Expresslax20]

tell your coach that ive been to camps where a lot of D1 players were and my select coach tells me to do something different...if you could just let me try this out it would be helpful

[tiplax]

if you can't find a way to talk to your coach, than go around him to the head coach. Try and ask your head coach leading questions, so eventually he will see that you are right, and maybe he'd have a talk with the other guy. or you could try that method on him

what age group is your team in? (varsity, JV, modified?), maybe ask the coaches if they would like to have your brother come in as a guest coach/speaker cause he played in college and can give tips and stuff

or just hit him in the face with a brick

[MACDADDY]

how did you have that guy as a coach in the first place if he doesnt know how to play d.

[OldPtboBoy]

Don't get pissed off until the end.

Are the rest of the defense having problems with this guy or just you? If the rest of the defense is playing with success under his system it may just be that you want to play your way in his system. More experienced coaches will run their game in an advanced system. In a Select situation or a D1 program they do not have to worry about varying levels of player ability. Your coach may. He may have you compensating for weaker play in another player or have other players compensating for your play. He may have devised a system to hide team defensive weaknesses and, your advanced level pushes offenses to the weak side of the field. You didn't say how your team was doing or how effective your defense has been as a whole.

Over the course of your career you will have coaches that you like, agree with and admire. You will also have coaches you hate, distrust and question. The thing to remember is that he is your coach. He's there for a reason unless you play for some pickup program that cannot acquire anything other than a non experienced volunteer and...............even in that situation you have to respect the fact that he/she is giving their time to your team.

Play his program the way he wants it played......or......away from the rest of the team, request a time that you two can meet (to avoid potential embarasment or pressure on either side) and discuss (without placing blame and slinging mud) why the team's defense is run that way and why he sees your role in it the way he does. If he's worth his weight he'll have a good answer and probably give you some insight into your role as a part of the greater good of the team.

Or....... he's a complete idiot there as a favor because he's putting money into the team. Remember, you don't just learn from doing things right. Learn from the things he's telling you. Even if you never apply them with another team for the rest of your life, you will have completed the course in what not to do.

And......no matter what you get some new equipment out of it. Enjoy the helmet.

[spenny]

My real question is for coaches how would you want a player (me) to approach you on this cause its frusturating

the best way to prepare for this is to go sit at the far end of a pine bench for about 2 1/2 hours.
because thats where you are going to find yourself if you arent VERY careful.

old PTOboys' advice is excellent btw.

[picknroll]

Also remember that different is not necessarily wrong. There are many "right" ways to play lacrosse. If you go attend 2 lacrosse camps and listen really close, I'll bet you come home finding at least a few differences in what is being taught.

Your coach could also be teaching something that is an adaptation to your age level or league rules also. For example I've found that slap checks draw more fouls than poke checks with our youth referees. Because of this I teach poke checks and discourage slap checks. There's nothing fundamentally wrong with a slap check, except our refs are conservative and are quick to call a slash on a missed slap check. Even if a D1 coach is teaching slap checks at a camp, I will still give the player the same advice within the context of our team and league. That doesn't make the camp advice wrong nor does it make me an idiot for teaching poke checks. It's just different.

I also agree with the advice about talking to your coach privately. Go ask him why that he is teaching a certain technique and tell him that it is different than what you learned in a camp. Most coaches appreciate this type of discussion. It shows that you are a student of the game and are interested in improving. I have one player on my team that spends almost every water break asking me questions about the previous drills. I love getting those questions. On the other hand if you disrupt a drill and tell everyone that some camp was teaching something different than your 'idiot' coach that is just disrespectful and will not get you too far. Don't assume that your coach is an idiot. Assume that he is teaching you something for a reason. It is perfectly legitimate to ask him those reasons in a respectful, non-disrputive way.

[CTLaxer]

oldptboboy offers up some great advice.

As a coach, I encourage my players to ask questions and say something if they think something I'm teaching them is wrong or if they think/know of a better way to do things. The caveat to this is that they have to do it in a respectful manner. Whinning about something in the middle of a drill is NOT the way to do it. If a player were to take me a side during a water break or after practice and raise a point, I'm more than happy to lend an hear and have a discussion.

My personal philosophy as a coach is to demonstrate both the wrong way and the right way to do things (right and wrong are subjective, just keep in mind every coach thinks his/her way is the right way). This way my players know why I do things a certain way and why doing them other ways can prove to be incorrect (even if what they are saying is correct, but not necessarily applicable to the situation/drill/system I have running).

Simply put, talk to your coach in private. You might be able to show him a few things he doesn't know about or hasn't really looked at before. Depending on how amicable your coach is, you might even be able to demonstrate something within a drill your way as opposed to his way, that way he can see the difference and if it merits adopting.

If it turns out he is fervently opposed to change and there's really nothing you can do about it, the best thing to do is to just grit your teeth and deal with it. As some have said before, you will have good coaches and bad coaches, regardless of which you have, you can always learn from them.

Keep us posted as to what, if any, outcome happens.

[Tehb2]

how did you have that guy as a coach in the first place if he doesnt know how to play d.

Hey, if its a public school, one doesn't know what kind of coach they'll have; whether or not they have played lacrosse, or truly know what they are talking about. Some coaches might just repeat things they have heard from college demonstrations but not know. The worst thing is when a coach can't recognize a problem in a player and help fix it, or fail to be able to adapt for situations in a game.

[The Hitman]

That's a hard one, and I know from first hand experience.

I'm a relatively new middle-school coach, never played, but have become a student of the game going to every clinic, class, game I can to learn what I can to teach my team. I KNOW I don't know a lot, but ...

I currently have a kid on my team that catches with both of his hands WAY down on his stick because that's what someone in camp taught him. He doesn't want to listen to me ask him to keep his top hand up because I supposedly 'don't know anything' but he drops the ball ALL the time!!!

My recommendation is to keep doing it the way that works best for you without saying anything, but know that at the end of the day a) your coach may be right, and b) he may even "pull rank" on you, ask you to do it his way, and you should do it & not worry about it.

[picknroll]

That's a hard one, and I know from first hand experience.

I'm a relatively new middle-school coach, never played, but have become a student of the game going to every clinic, class, game I can to learn what I can to teach my team. I KNOW I don't know a lot, but ...

I currently have a kid on my team that catches with both of his hands WAY down on his stick because that's what someone in camp taught him. He doesn't want to listen to me ask him to keep his top hand up because I supposedly 'don't know anything' but he drops the ball ALL the time!!!

My recommendation is to keep doing it the way that works best for you without saying anything, but know that at the end of the day a) your coach may be right, and b) he may even "pull rank" on you, ask you to do it his way, and you should do it & not worry about it.

Our local lacrosse "expert" that gives private lessons and coaches all star teams also teaches catching with the hands down the stick in position to throw. He describes this as "efficiency of motion" as there is less wasted motion in hand movement if you throw and catch from the same hand position.

Of course you've got to be an experienced enough player to be able to catch the ball with your hands down the stick. As you say when beginners try this they generally drop the ball. That's the problem with any advice. It's never one size fits all. It's the coach's job to teach technique that is appropriate to the skill level and experience of the players. The players need to be respectful to the coach and understand this.

[spike191]

Just a question, but what is the exact thing that you are disagreeing on, maybe he is right? you might not know it yet?

[Bobsch]

Just a question, but what is the exact thing that you are disagreeing on, maybe he is right? you might not know it yet?

I was going to ask the same question. For example, there are many different slide packages. In the video "Adjusting Your Multiple Defensive System to Win!" Bill Tierney talks about many variables you can change on defense. None of them is right or wrong....the only things that matter are if they work for your defensive players and work well against your opponents.